1. Stop staring, she said, and the lips in the mirror moved in sync. She felt brand new, or maybe not as much newly made but definitely newly defined. Perhaps she would leave town, drive a few hundred miles, introduce herself as Francesca Wilds, and become a fashionable yet unbelievably talented dance instructor. Oh, she could see the dreamy-eyed men and perfectly balanced hopeful young women twirling around her now.
Excuse me, may I help you? the slightly perky saleswoman asked, leaning over the counter to examine scratches in the paneling. That is a beautiful color on you; do you wear hats often?
2. He asked so many questions that the posh ladies eating their summer salads next to us actually stopped talking to hear my responses. Yes, I have a sibling; yes, my parents are still together; yes, I earned my Bachelor's degree; yes, I have volunteered for the United Way for 8 years; yes, I am married; no, I do not have children -- Posh Ladies are still listening-- yes, I have taken drugs before; yes, I have been convicted of a felony (in a quieter but loud enough voice I explain that I ran a small operation that smuggled iPhones to Polk City and Panama Beach, but was actually convicted for the armed robbery of a store formerly known as Burdines). This long-awaited interview would be postponed until facts were verified; however, the Posh Ladies' small gasps and critically shaped eyebrows told me I had successfully delivered my answers.
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